What do I do when I’m slightly bored?

I update the logo on my website.

And I’m still outdated in everything else!

Many years ago, somewhere around early 2005 to be precise, I had a discussion/disagreement with a drummer when he said “You need a logo.” I said it works for others but not necessary for what I do. He kept harping on “You need to market better! You need something like what Kiss and Led Zeppelin have.” As I said, logos work for them. Same with brands like Coca-Cola, Facebook, etc.

I do instrumental music for Pete’s sake!!!

Joe Satriani had a different logo with every album. So did Steve Vai, Motley Crue, Rush, Prince, and Deep Purple. And I don’t think anyone complained about that (maybe the drummer I had in my band 20 years ago did). I always say it as every time I did a new album, a new font was needed to reflect things. I get it that it’s all about branding/marketing/whatever.

I simply don’t care.

And yes I’ve been told plenty of times that “You suck at networking” and they’re right. I suck at marketing too but somehow I can promote quite well. For me, it’s always been about the music. I mean, look at the front cover of Bon Jovi’s SLIPPERY WHEN WET. He had to change it so he ran his finger over a wet Hefty bag. Millions sold.

Logos be damned.

We all struggle with various aspects of our lives. One that definitely seems to be the most talked-about is fitting in. We all want to feel validated/admired/appreciated but at what expense?

When you’re unique, it’s sometimes not welcomed.

We’re living in an age where generations are clashing left and right. We’ve often said “We won’t talk like our parents do/did” and yet here we are! We try to be open-minded about things but ultimately it just doesn’t happen. How often do we catch ourselves saying “Back in my day” or “Today’s music sucks”.

Guilty as charged.

I guess we can’t help ourselves. So where does that leave us? Are we destined to be islands unto ourselves? Or do we wear the right clothes, say the right catch phrases, and listen to music we can’t stand just to be accepted? For some, the desperation is palpable.

I wanted to fit somewhere all of my life. I never fit at home or school as a kid. Figured “If I got really good on guitar, people would flock to me.” Nope. And heaven forbid I use words longer than four letters! I can curse with the best of them but ultimately it sounds cheap and trite. (Get me pissed off, and it’s over HAHA) With the exception of where I teach, I never fit at any job. Was always reprimanded for something trivial. Again, when you’re different, people can’t handle it. They say “I love a challenge” but the challenge for them is to change you.

As I said in the previous blog, I am proud to be quirky/eccentric/weird/strange. I am fully aware of that. I think quite a few people were shoehorned by society early on in life, and only know one way to exist. They don’t know how to live, they only know how to stay inside the lines. Don’t make any sudden moves, and you’ll get along just fine.

Thankfully, I have come across some people who feel the same way I do. We talk about “where do we belong?” and the answer is simple: We’re meant to shine, not blend. I’ve been told that I have balls to pull off wearing funky sneakers, colorful flannel shirts, do instrumental music, and now I have fuzzy straps for Pete’s sake!! Guess I’m more confident than I give myself credit for. So to those who find it hard to fit in…STOP TRYING! You have a tribe, and it may be small but accepting. Everyone else are too busy keeping up with the Joneses.

Now go get yourself a V-Tar fuzzy strap!!!

Whenever I go somewhere in my town, inevitably (but not often), I will hear something from a teenager or pre-teen:

“I like your style!”

Hmmm…I look like a hybrid of 70s/80s but with my own sense of…style? I wear what feels good. Whether it’s t-shirt/jeans/sneakers, or leather jacket/flannel shirt/Doc Martens, I’m just me. I never had a style that anyone wanted to copy.

Same with my music and guitar playing.

A friend of mine who’s a piano teacher said this to me a while back (I was given permission to share and that I would not mention the person’s name):

“You’re original. So even when playing others music, it sounds like you. When you play your own stuff, others can’t understand it or just cannot truly comprehend.”

This made total sense but at the same time, I scratched my head over this. I’d heard as far back as the 80s that “You have your own style” when it came to how I play. I always joked that I’m like Steve Vai but all the wrong notes. I would hear something like Metallica and get inspired. Then hear The Police. Then John McLaughlin…you get the picture. I love metal but couldn’t sit still with absorbing other sounds and styles. I like heavy, aggressive music but I couldn’t kill a fly if it was dead. I’ve always had some degree of melody along with playing tasteless noises. Hearing the textural sounds of Andy Summers or Jamie West-Oram was as thrilling as the shred of Yngwie Malmsteen and Tony MacAlpine. Yet it all made sense to me.

Now throw Prince in the mix…hooooo-boy!

When you are scattered yet focused with your influences, that will ruffle some feathers. Inevitably (and always) I hear “Why can’t you write like…?” or “Why must you use that sound?” Even family members would say things such as “Play what people like, get rich, and then you can do what you want.” Not so fast! I have to be honest with myself. Period.

How can one be unique? Simple: Acknowledge your influences but learn to step outside the circle. I was trapped by my influences too, who wouldn’t be? Think it was around the fifth album GO BERZERK! where I felt like I was transitioning and shifting into a new type of guitarist and writer. LAYERS OF TIME came out four years later and things leveled up. The late great Neil Peart once said that Rush’s MOVING PICTURES was when they “truly became Rush”. That’s how I felt with GB and then LOT. Once I let go of who I “should” be as a guitarist/writer, I felt more liberated.

Most musicians want to be shackled to a particular style or image. I wanted to be the metal guy but it’s not in me. Never was. I’m a bit esoteric in that regard. When eyebrows curl up, that’s how I know I’m challenging metal people. I still love metal, it’s a huge part of my DNA. But I always wrote what felt good. Much like I wear what feels good.

Pink flannel shirts are metal 🙂

I should be at NAMM this weekend. I should be walking around, visiting booths and pretending to be a guitar god for a few days.

I should be working on new music but then realize people only want familiarity.

I should be a step ahead of seasonal depression but it’s kicking my ass.

I should be casting negative thoughts out of my head but when you’re surrounded by negativity and passive-aggressiveness, it’s not easy.

But I’m glad to not be at NAMM this weekend. I’m happy teaching, staying close to home, and being greeted by the power trio of cats you see above. I always said if you want to be in a room full of narcissistic, self-serving, insecure people, go to a NAMM show. It’s mind-blowing.

And I had been writing music but not in any shape to do anything past the demo stage. Being creative is vital; being subject to ridicule isn’t. People definitely want the tried-and-true, and after years of hearing “Why can’t you write a song like…?” or worse, it was time for me to walk away.

Seasonal depression found me again but I’m doing my best to stay focused. We’ve not had much snow but it’s been brutally cold, painfully so. I pine for the days of warmer weather and lesser clothing. T-shirt/shorts/sneakers for me. (I do know people who get this in the summer though!)

And when you are constantly being barraged with negativity, after a while, you can tune it out. It’s not easy but once you get past that hump, it’s good. The more I “grey rock” people, the happier I will be. I have 55 years to unpack and then maybe the same amount of time to feel better about myself.

Can I live to over 100? Perhaps.

I will still challenge what’s “normal” though 😉

I was going to deep-six this website. It’s kind of dead wood to me, and at least I’m being honest about it. But what’s preventing me from doing so?

Aside from posting pics of funky gear?

I feel it would be a big disservice to my friend Alexx Calise, who suggested I do this site back in 2019, if I got rid of it. Like anything new, people flock to it, get excited…and then move on. My biggest problem is that I expect(ed) people to really dig my trip and that’s simply not feasible. If anything, it’s downright delusional. So I had to take a gigantic step back.

I gave this site a new coat of paint a while back, and people dug it. I cleaned some pages up, and am sure more needs to be done. But I’m a box of rocks with this stuff; my fear is one false move and BYE BYE to my hard work. I used to put my trust in people with managing past sites, only to be met with insouciance and then tarnishing things. I’m alone here and that suits me fine.

So what else should I do to make this site more active? Hmmm…thinking thinking…maybe make a page featuring other bands’ links? Well, since I rarely get support from others (at least on a local level), I can toss that idea in the garbage. Do I mention “bigger name” artists and their sites too? Nah, that will make me look like a name-dropper/social climber. I’ve no desire to be either.

Wonder if there’s a way to do livestreams on here like on FB and IG. Would that work if given the opportunity? I don’t have a cool studio or anything. Scratch that.

I had friggin’ SNOW on here (thanks to the folks at WordPress) and that perked some interest. Maybe there’ll be hearts for Valentines’ Day? Or three ships for Columbus Day?

Promoting on socials is a pain because the algorithms get messed up. FB, Twitter (I will never call it X), IG…they don’t want you to leave their platforms.

There has to be a way…

Any ideas?

Is this not the longest January ever? Seems like that to me.

But Xmas came later in the form of three new pieces of gear!!!

First up: Orange Micro Dark 20 watt amp head. Like the Micro Terror, it has a tube in the pre-amp and the rest is solid state. Which means…THIS THING CRANKS!!! It’s got a much heavier tone and that’s good! Cleans up real well too and has an effects loop. For us guitar nerds, these features matter. For others, well, you can just golf-clap.

Second piece: Flamma FC11 envelope filter. I am seriously digging these smaller pedals made by smaller companies. Most are only available through Amazon, so I check out YouTube demo videos before I make a move. My signature Slippery Gypsy pedal died right before a gig last week, so it was time to search for a pedal that has the envelope feature. In short, it’s an auto wah that you control with your picking hand as opposed to your feet (again, guitar nerd talk). I checked out other brands and this one stood out because, well, it’s YELLOW and reasonably priced. It handles clean tones well but was a bit tough to navigate at first with distortion. I found the sweet spot though. So I can recreate my Bootsy/Stevie Salas sounds again! (**The other side of the Slippery Gypsy pedal was a uni-vibe, so I ordered a second Kokko vibe!)

Last but not least, the creme de menthe: V-Tar fuzzy hot pink guitar strap!!! I saw this on Amazon and thought “This is too goofy and cool, gotta get one!” Then I learned it was being shipped from the UK! Thankfully shipping was free WHEW! I received this strap today after waiting maybe two weeks or so. Upon taking it out of the padded envelope…OH COME ON!!! It’s very bright and super funky!! Now I look more metal than ever 🙂

I cannot wait to do more gigs now that I have all this gear 🙂

New Years Eve 2024…I receive a Facebook message:

“If you good for this Friday, black river barn. 10pm show”

So my last day of the year started off with being needed for a Supernova gig four days later. And I didn’t expect to hear about any shows until maybe March/April.

Threw on a new set of orange Aurora Strings on ye olde Universe and brushed up on the songs. Added a few new ones, and we were off and running. Always a blast playing with these guys and they appreciate my brand of sonic squalor for three sets.

The best part though? This was the most relaxed that I can recall about playing. No feelings of “Wow I hope people like me” and “Someone better tell me that I can play guitar.” Those days are behind me, replaced with feelings of “I really enjoy playing more than ever!” Once I dialed in my sounds, the mood was just right. Getting lost in the music is the best.

And for some strange reason, any time I sit in with Supernova, someone in the crowd yells “Slayer!” Hmmm…I must give off REIGN IN BLOOD vibes.

As of now, 2025 is starting off on a loud note (or in my case, too many notes) and hope the trend continues.

Boy do I need sleep though.